Why I Don’t Help Students Settle (And Why I Refunded a Paid Session)

I work with all kinds of students—not just 4.0 overachievers. I work with kids who are stuck. Burnt out. Behind. I’ve helped students who had no confidence or no support and they still got where they needed to go.

Because the secret is this: you don’t have to be perfect, but you do have to try. And if you try, I can usually get you to believe in yourself again.

But what I won’t do? What I can’t do? Is help you settle for a lesser future just because it's easier in the moment.

The Story

A student recently came to me after being admitted to two schools:

• Emory University, a top 25 research university in Atlanta, with an ~11% acceptance rate

• Florida Institute of Technology (FIT), a small STEM-focused school with an ~64% acceptance rate

She said she wanted to go into medicine—possibly become a doctor.

Emory has a nationally renowned pre-med program, direct partnerships with Emory Hospital, and access to the CDC, top-tier labs, and professors doing groundbreaking research in medicine and public health. It’s a school with prestige, structure, and the kind of support that makes med school not just a dream—but a real path.

FIT is a regional school. It’s not a flagship Florida university like UF or FSU. It doesn’t have a med school partnership. It doesn’t have a strong pre-med reputation. While it has its place for certain tech or engineering programs, it’s simply not built for students trying to go to top-tier medical school.

She told me Emory would cost about $60,000 per year. FIT was offering closer to $30,000.

But when I asked if she had submitted a real financial aid appeal to Emory, she said she had just emailed a little. No documentation. No formal letter. Nothing official.

I offered to help her through the process in a one-hour session she had already paid for. She declined. Said she’d made up her mind. That it wasn’t worth fighting for.

Then she said something that was a straight-up lie:

“FIT is still a good school where most undergrads get into really good graduate schools such as Emory.”

I Knew She'd Been Lied To

Objectively, most FIT undergraduates will not get into good graduate schools like Emory. 

According to FIT's own 2022–2023 Graduate Outcome Report, within six months of graduation:​ 86% of students were employed. 11% were enrolled in graduate studies. This indicates that only a small fraction of FIT graduates pursue immediate graduate education, and the report does not specify how many attend top-tier institutions like Emory.​ 

On the other hand, Emory has a robust pre-health advising program. For the 2024 application cycle, 65% of Emory undergraduates who applied to medical school were accepted. For those with a GPA of 3.7+ and MCAT scores of 510+, the acceptance rate was 85%.

It is possible to get into a great med school from anywhere—but that doesn’t mean every school gives you the same shot.

Medical school admissions are brutal. Most students don’t get in on their first try. Many don’t get in at all. Schools like Emory, Duke, WashU, and Columbia have medical school acceptance rates that are twice as high for their own undergraduates than the national average. Why?

Because students there have:

• Access to research labs as early as freshman year

• Built-in shadowing programs at teaching hospitals

• Faculty letters from names that carry weight

• Structured MCAT support and actual med school advisors

• A peer group that motivates them to aim higher, not just coast

FIT has none of that. You’d be doing everything alone. No one’s going to put your resume on the top of the pile. Admissions committees don’t pretend all undergrads are created equal—because they’re not.

So no, it’s not “the same.” Not even close. Even a brilliant student will be at a serious disadvantage. 

This Might Cost More Than Med-School Chances

More elite schools are often more generous with aid—not less. That sounds backward, but it’s true. Schools like Emory, Notre Dame, Vanderbilt, and even Ivy League schools have large endowments and well-funded aid offices. They can and often do offer thousands more in grants, merit, or need-based aid—if you ask for it the right way.

I’ve helped students get:

• $20,000+ extra after a well-documented appeal

• Aid matches from other private colleges

• Lower net prices at Notre Dame than at Bucknell, Villanova, or Syracuse

Why? Because those smaller schools are often tuition-dependent. They don’t have the same financial flexibility. Big-name schools want to yield top students, and they’re willing to negotiate.

So when a student says “Emory is too expensive” without appealing, without documenting, without trying? It’s not a mature decision. It’s an incomplete one.

And honestly? With one hour of help and some small outside scholarships, we might’ve gotten Emory cheaper than FIT.

So Why Did I Refund the Session?

Because I won’t charge a family to help them walk backwards. Her father had originally hired me specifically to help her refocus on Emory. But when I did just that—directly and with a roadmap to try—he turned on me. Called me pompous. Told me to raise my own child.

So, I refunded the session. Not because I didn’t care. Because I cared too much to pretend this was fine and fail a student for any amount of money.

I'm not a parent. But many incredible moms and dads have taught me parenting isn’t just about loving your kid. It’s about helping them make decisions that protect their long-term wellbeing, even when those decisions are uncomfortable. That means refusing to let a life-changing opportunity slip by without even trying to fight for it. Even when your kid pushes back.  Even when you're scared, too.

What I Will Do

If your student is struggling, uncertain, or discouraged, I’m here. If your family is wrestling with financial aid questions, I’ll go step-by-step. If your kid doesn’t think they’re “that kind of student,” I’ll show them why they might be wrong.

I will push them because I believe in them. I’ll meet them where they are—but I won’t help them hide. I’m not in this to validate fear. I help students claim their future.

And if they don’t want to? If they decide not to try?

Then I’ll hand back the check and say, with respect: You deserve more. But I can’t want it more than you do.